Browsing Archives for Details

Cabinet Agony

March 3rd, 2008

I am in complete and utter agony. Torture torture torture. There are two sides to my misbegotten, bizarre, giant weirdo personality. The first half of my personality likes for things to be nice, well made, pretty, interesting, and somehow right. I am not a perfectionist. I can live with flaws and mistakes, but I can’t live with outright ugly. Outright ugly must be fixed as soon as possible with a can of paint, a piece of fabric, a glue gun, paperclips… whatever it takes.

Now the other half of my personality hates to tell people what to do. HATES it! Unless it is my own kids. And even then, I prefer for them to figure things out on their own. But because I don’t want to raise misbegotten, bizarre, giant weirdo kids like myself, I try to shape them somewhat with a few orders sent their way now and then. Everyone else in the world is on their own. I don’t want to tell you how to do things, what to do, and especially to do something over again.

So today – I had to mix these two ends of my personality – the end that likes pretty things and the end that hates to tell people to do something over again. And it was awful and I still fell like crap and I think I will for quite a while.

The cabinets didn’t turn out quite like I had imagined – actually it is just the drawer fronts in the kitchen. I ordered plain slab drawer fronts because I am deranged and didn’t want to have to clean out little grooves. So I thought what difference does it make… a few drawers will be plain… the rest of the cabinets will be fancy and just the drawers plain. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. The rest of the cabinets are gorgeous. But the drawer fronts which were built exactly to MY specifications look ALL WRONG! They turned out big and slabby, and square, and like evil robot drawers! It is my fault – mine mine mine – but it has to be fixed and I had to ask for it to be fixed and it was very very hard.

Over the course of this construction process I have had to do this more than once. Not a lot, but enough to get a teensy bit better at it. I am still terrible, but not as terrible. So – I asked for the change and said I am sorry ten thousand times and then I got down on my belly and slunk out of the cabinet shop. I feel like I murdered someone. Is their a drug out there to make this go away… Can someone suggest a good psychiatrist?… Maybe I’ll just go get a frozen Dr. Pepper…

After I slunk off, I came home and talked to the country doctor. And may I just say that if the country doctor was a psychiatrist, all of his patients would have shot themselves long ago. His “PLEASE make me feel better about myself please” skills are TERRIBLE. He makes me feel WORSE. However, he did agree to go back out to the cabinet shop with me to see what the best remedy would be.

When we arrived, I was sure that all the men who work there would be stationed in the bushes with a rifle pointed at my head. At best, I figured they would all fall silent and look away when I walked in. But they didn’t. They actually were very nice. One came up and said – you know you are going to stare at these cabinets a long time – you might as well get something you like. They they all took turns making fun of me for changing things this late in the game INCLUDING THE COUNTRY DOCTOR!!! – But at least they were laughing with… I mean at… me and not tossing me out on the streets.

I feel I need to remind everyone that I live in a small town. Those of you who live in big cities might think it is absurd to worry about how the cabinet makers feel – but the thing is that I will see these men downtown, at school functions, at parades, in the grocery store, and at ball games, for the rest of my life. So maintaining a decent relationship is kind of important. It is probably wise even if you live in L.A. or N.Y.C. You never know when you might have to work with someone again. OH NO – I think I just told you what to do! Now I will have to slink off and go get another frozen Dr. Pepper.

I have a thing for old sinks. I have tried all sorts of new age therapies, homemade herbal remedies and straight up chemical detox and I still have a thing for old sinks. I just think they are soooooo beautiful. Why did they stop making them?

Oh! Maybe because they weight 17 tons. People must have been tougher in the old sink days. Because I can’t fathom why they would even bother installing these things when instead, they could just wait until it rains to wash their dishes. That is how heavy these things are! What were the shipping costs? Plumbers must have been former professional weight lifters!

I bought the kitchen sink on E-bay. I looked for a long time trying to find one that I could afford and that had two bowls, at least one side which had to be fairly deep. I was hoping for both an apron front and a backsplash, but the price on this one was hard to beat. This one was listed under “old sinks” instead of “vintage” or “antique” sinks – so it did not get nearly the bids that some of the sinks I was going for received. As a result it was truly a bargain. Until you ADD THE SHIPPING!!!

And above is pictured our lovely laundry room sink which I also got on EBay, for 10 bucks. It was located close by, so I picked it up and paid zero shipping. It is in pretty rough shape. I may have to get it re-surfaced. Which will make it not such a bargain anymore.

Above is pictured our main floor bathroom sink. It was originally a wall sink. When I bought it , it was in almost perfect condition. The large chip happened while at the cabinet shop. They are going to pay for the repair. I decided to have the sink placed on a base. I think a longer “skirt board” is needed as well as a shelf on the lower half to sort of break up those very long legs. I am going to paint the wood when it is all done. Trust me – this is going to look great. You just have to believe.

And here is our free footed tub. Eric, our plumber salvaged it out of a rental house he owns. He told us if we got it out of the house, we could have it. It will also have to be re-finished. I was under the impression we could get it re-finished on site, so we hauled it up the stairs to the master bath. However, since I would like both the inside and the outside of the tub re-finished, it has to be done in the re-finisher’s shop. So now, we have to haul it back down the stairs. A task I will probably try and accomplish today. So if I never post again, you will know that I have perished – crushed beneath a twenty ton tub.