Browsing Archives for May 2010

After school, my youngest son Jack went over to a friend’s house to play. At dinnertime I called my neighbor and said, “Please send Jack home and if he balks about riding his bike in the rain, I will come and get him.”

Because whenever Jack is around his mother he balks about everything.

Because he is my baby.

And he knows that nine times out of ten, if he yelps at just the right frequency, I will scoop him up in my arms and stuff him full of cotton candy and coca cola and read him stories and swing him around and play games with him until that little smile flutters back across his face.

He is ruined.

Utterly ruined.

But he is only ruined around me.

His brothers have no patience with Jack’s balking and they beat him mercilessly whenever he even tries to play the baby card.

His father also fails to respond to Jack’s balking and insists that he suck it up.

So Jack and I are a sort of refuge for each other.

He agrees to stay my baby and I agree to stay his protector, defender and respond to all the slightest whimperings and rearrange the ENTIRE UNIVERSE to make his life BETTER!

So that Jack and I get along fine as long as we both remember the rules.

These are the rules…

Jack tells me what to do.

And I do it.

Immediately.

__________________________________________________________________________________________

So back to this rain thing.

I hung up the phone with my neighbor and looked at the Country Doctor who was rolling his eyes up so far in his head that I thought he was having a seizure.

Me – MY GOD! HONEY!  HONEY!!  ARE YOU HAVING A SEIZURE! Drew! Drew! Get a stick! Quickly! We have to pry your dad’s mouth open and put a stick in there so he won’t bite off his toungue!

Drew – Get a what?

Me – Get a stick!  For your dad!  He is having a seizure!

Mike – I AM NOT HAVING A SEIZURE!  I am just amazed that you think you have to go and pick up Jack just because it is raining!

Me – I only said I would pick him up if he BALKED! Do you want me to seem like a cold hearted parent who doesn’t care if her child drowns on the way home from the neighbors!

Mike – If that had been Drew over at the neighbors in a rainstorm, you would have forced him to crawl home… on his knees.. over a bed of pointy rocks! But if it is Jack – you pick him up and wrap him in a blanket and rub his back and carry him home on your back!

Me – But he’s so HELPLESS! And TINY! He’s only EIGHT! For crying out loud – what am I supposed to do? Let him sob all the way home?

Mike – He won’t sob! He will love it! Riding a bike in the rain is FUN!

Me – Maybe for you!  Maybe for people who like to suffer! But for people like me and Jack – it is different! We want to be picked up and given warm, sugary sustenance and then taken to a movie and then to the mall where we can buy a new outfit or maybe a new video game and then go get some sour watermelons at the candy store!

Mike – He is fine!  You don’t need to go and pick him up.

Me – Well… I am going to go watch him and we’ll see just how fine he really is!

So I took my camera out to the porch to document Jack’s bike ride home in the rain.

And as USUAL!  I WAS RIGHT!.  

Jack was in a state of insufferable misery the entire way home.

Just look at these photos!

 

The rain was pouring down. It doesn’t seem like it was – but it was.

 


Look at the agony on his face!   He’s so downcast he can’t even avoid that muddy puddle!

 


Do you see that!  How he is looking down at his muddy pants!  He is visibly upset about it!


This is my brave toddler – covered in mud and rain dutifully putting his bike away through a veil of immense pain and suffering.


And this is when he tried to pretend to be okay about it all as he came in the house because he didn’t want to upset his mother.  He is SO BRAVE!

But don’t you people worry! I scooped him up and dried him off and stuffed him full of marshmallows and chocolates. And I promised him that I would never let him endure such agony again.

The Country Doctor suffered from another one of his eye rolling seizures.

But I couldn’t help him this time.

I had to take care of my baby.

Immediately!

First Spring Salad 2010

May 19th, 2010

On Saturday, I harvested my first salad of the season.

 

 

And a handful of radishes.

My first radishes ever!

They grow so fast.

One day they are little squiggly red roots.

And the next…

Radishes!

 

 

I brought them in and gave them a bath.

And since I was frying some bacon for the soup – I went ahead and made the recipe for bacon grease salad dressing.

Because what is the point of eating salad if there isn’t a little bacon grease in it?

It’s really the recipe for wilted lettuce.

Did you know that ‘wilted lettuce’ is one of the all time top searches that lands people on this blog?  

Poor, wretched souls!  They had no idea what they were getting themselves into!?!

To make wilted greens you take a teaspoon of bacon grease and add vinegar, brown sugar and salt to taste.  I probably use two tablespoons of brown sugar, a dash of salt and maybe an 1/8 C of vinegar.  But you will desire an entirely different proportion of these ingredients.  So leave plenty of room for error.  

 

Serve with potato bacon soup and hot biscuits!

On a cold rainy Saturday in the Spring.

Honey!

Is it ever good!

First Spring Salad 2010!

May 19th, 2010

I harvested my first tender salad of the year!

And made some wilted greens.

The whole sordid tale is up at Farmhouse and Garden.

Thanks to everyone for the kind words over the past few days.  

And for giving me the ‘okay’ to be completely random.  It will still seem kind of ludicrous to me to go from a bumpy heated debate on the validity of the resurrection to a post with the title – CHECK OUT MY AWESOME RADISHES!  All I can figure is that you people must have stomachs made of iron.