Browsing Archives for December 2009

A Very Cassie Christmas

December 23rd, 2009

Two of the girls that I work with have the same first name and that name is ‘Cassie’ (except without the quotation marks). We have tried an assortment of methods to distinguish one ‘Cassie’ from the other ‘Cassie’. Sometimes we add the last initial and say ‘Cassie C.’ which sounds like ‘CasSeeSee’ and then the other Cassie goes by ‘C-Dubya’, but this method requires that we remember last names and due to the four holes in my head (where the babies came out) I can’t remember last names anymore. I find that adjectives are far more helpful to me so sometimes I refer to one Cassie as ‘Curly Cassie’ while the other Cassie is ‘Straight Cassie’ but oh dear… that doesn’t sound quite right… maybe it would be better to consider ‘Crazy Cassie’ and then um… ‘Sane Cassie’ – no that doesn’t sound very good.  How about ‘Quiet Cassie’ and um… ‘Loud’… or no wait… ‘Not Quite as Quiet…’ or er… um…. so you can see that the adjectives don’t work very well either.  So eventually, I have settled on using the places that the Cassies come from to describe them and so there’s nice and safe ‘Alaska Cassie’ and then the ‘never going to upset anyone by even sounding slightly insulting’,  ’Kansas City Cassie’.  Phew!  That was a close one!

Even though the two Cassies are very different from each other, their identical names have resulted in the two of them developing their own special language which greatly entertains the rest of us. For instance, if they don’t understand what a customer wants they call this ‘Cassie Confusion’. When they can’t solve a customer’s problem they call this a ‘Cassie Conundrum’. When the store is really busy and the phone is ringing off the hook and then the cash register breaks down, this is of course ‘Cassie Chaos’ and can often result in a ‘Cassie Catastrophe’, however if they can fix the cash register, they are oh so ‘Cassie Clever’. So, when one of the Cassies threw a party last week – it could only be called one thing – ‘Cassie Christmas’.

And of course there was a white elephant gift exchange.

Of which the prize gift was a hand crafted, pink poodle, jar cover… thingy.

Which Alaska Cassie was lucky enough to get in the first round.




And then quickly swiped by ‘K.C. Cassie’ in the next round.





At which point, I took the poodle for myself.

Because – clearly.



And then ‘Cursed Cassie’ stole it back!






And I ended up with this dumb old beer can hat.

And I decided that I was the victim of a ‘Cassie Calamity’!  
So I threw a ‘Cassie Conniption!’
And my name isn’t even Cassie!



The Other Non-Cassie Attendees







AnneMarie – you might remember her from last year’s episode of the sparkly bow.





AnneMarie and Liz






‘Criminal Cassie’ with Darla and Melissa.

Examining a house plant because that is what plant people do at parties… when they are not stealing each other’s poodles.





These were the delicious won-ton, sausage, cheese, appetizers that ‘Cruel Cassie’ made for the party. They were really good. I found a similar recipe here – but I feel it imperative to note that ‘Cantankerous Cassie’ added red bell pepper to her version.




The Country Doctor models the beer can hat.

Holy Crap!  

It’s almost Christmas!  

What am I doing sitting at my computer!

Merry Merry – Joy Joy,


I originally posted this letter two years ago – but it is worth a repeat.


I just recently received my mom’s annual Christmas letter. It is as usual, chock full of tantalizing tidbits about the lives of my parents including a detailed description of my parents’ morning routine which I now know includes two cups of hot tea for my mother – one before she attends her “Shape Up Sisters” workout class and a second cup when she gets home from her “Shape Up Sisters” workout class. I was also interested to discover that my parents’ breakfast menu offers a choice of either cold cereal or hot cereal along with that second cup of  tea. While my brain was doing backflips to try and keep up with this fast-paced, endearing, yet strangely riveting letter I came across the following paragraph …

The last 2 years have also brought a different chapter in our lives as Harry and my Dad are rejoicing in heaven. We have also said farewell to very dear people in our lives Aunt Ruth and Uncle Wilbur. We both know it is selfish to wish for them to still be here on earth with us when they were so ready to go

As I mentioned, my mom is writing the letter so when she writes “my dad” that would be my grandpa. And, yes, he did pass away this year. But the MORE startling information is the name that precedes “my grandpa” which says “Harry”. She writes Harry and my Dad are rejoicing in heaven. What the… Harry is MY DAD and if he has “passed on” it is news to me!!!

I frantically called my mom to find out if Dad was still among the living and if he wasn’t, why exactly she chose her Christmas letter to deliver this tragic news to me!

“Mom! Mom!  is Dad dead?” I yelped into the phone.

“No, Your father is not dead, he is watching “The Biggest Loser” on television with me.”

Then I told her about the letter and how it says that Harry is dead, and she said…

“It must be the way you are reading it.”

No, mom it is not the way I am reading it… You said that Dad is dead!” 

“Well your father proofread the letter, so how could he have let the letter say he is dead?  

“I don’t know mom, but it clearly states that your Dad… and Harry are rejoicing in heaven, and I am pretty sure you have to be dead to do that!”

“Your dad is not dead because he eats too much to be dead… and he also complains too much to be dead.”

I was very relieved to hear that my father is still “with us”. I mentioned that mom might want to send out a little note to all her Christmas letter recipients and let them know that Harry is not dead.

“That’s ridiculous! I’m NOT going to send out 60 notes to people to tell them that Harry is not dead.

So – if any of my distant kin and far flung family read this blog – my dad, Harry, is NOT dead. Repeat NOT DEAD. This was just a little mistake in the Family Christmas letter.


On the off, off chance that this post has ONCE AGAIN served to send my mom reeling in electrifying shockwaves of loathsome grief over her delinquent daughter posting awful things on the internet for the entire world to read – I offer up a few pics of her adorable grandchildren as a sweet salve.

KeeeeeeeRipes! He’s six now.

How long has it been since you were THIS excited about opening up a present?

He made it in kindergarten. It still tops our tree with pride.

This one’s for you mom. I love you. Even if you did try to kill dad off in the Christmas letter.

Sledding – A Triple Threat

December 19th, 2009

Once upon a time there were three brothers….


Who took a sled to the park….



And they all wanted to ride at the same time…




So there was only one solution…




And it worked pretty good….




The End.