I Had Head Lice When I Went to Visit Pioneer Woman's Ranch

November 4th, 2009

Early this Spring, I visited Pioneer Woman’s Ranch.  For those of you that don’t know who I am speaking of when I say ‘Pioneer Woman’ let me just give you a quick run down.  Pioneer Woman is a very famous blog written by Oklahoma ranch wife Ree Drummond.  Her blog covers four major areas: confessions, homeschooling, photography and cooking.  I don’t read the cooking section of her blog because cooking blogs make me feel hungry, tired and extremely inadequate.  I also don’t read the photography section of her blog because photography blogs… bleh.  Pioneer Woman also has a section on her blog called ‘Home and Garden’ where she talks about her home and never talks about her garden.  I’m not even sure she has a garden, but I do know she has a home.  In fact she has at least two homes and they are very close to each other.  Because she has two homes and seemingly no garden, I think she should re-name the ‘Home and Garden’ section of her blog to ‘Home and Home’.  Wait!  I just remembered that she has another home somewhere in Texas!  Maybe she should call the ‘Home and Garden’ section of her blog ‘Home and Home and Home‘.

Or maybe…

Home and Home and No Garden and Also Another Home.

Homes Yes Ma’am – Gardens No Sir!

Home and Hoof

Homes and Hooves

Home, Home, Home And A Garden Gnome

Speaking of homes, she also has a homeschooling section on her blog.  Sometimes I read this section of her blog to self-infuriate.  I am sure that homeschoolers do the same thing on the section of my blog called ‘public-schooling’.  This is where I write about my journey as the tireless, heroic, selfless, long suffering mother of four, who every day yanks her four kids out of bed, shoves them on the school bus and then does a delirious happy dance as the bus disappears around the bend.

“Bye!”

“Bye boys!”

“Mommy loves you!”

“Don’t hurry home!”

I also post all my favorite Bible verses in this section.

Now…

What was this blog about?

Oh yes!

Head Lice.

I wrote about our head lice infestation shortly after we got back from our visit to Pioneer Woman’s home (which is beside her other home) in Oklahoma.  This was a very difficult period in my life.  (And yes… they all are).  I was trying to launch a new blog with a stupid title that made no sense because this was supposed to be a blog where my sister, April and I blogged together but somewhere along the way, I realized that I didn’t want to blog with anyone.  I didn’t want to share this one little corner of the universe that I had hacked out for myself with anyone.  This is my corner of the universe!  Get out!  GET OUT! OUT!!!!!

After April packed her virtual bags, I was left with a stupid domain name and a blog that was really meant for two people and not one.  I didn’t feel like I could just throw away all the money I had invested in the project and start over, so I sort of cobbled it all together and came up with the mess that you see in front of you.  It isn’t perfect, but it’ll do little donkey… it’ll do.  (name that movie).

And that brings us back to head lice.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Before we left to visit Pioneer Woman’s home (which is right beside her other home), we had treated everyone in our house for head lice. You see, our kids attend Satan’s public schools and as a result, they frequently come home with demons inside of them.  It is especially horrifying when their heads spin around and they start writing messages for help by poking up the skin from inside of their bellies. I have grown accustomed to the nightly levitation, the violently shaking beds and the projectile vomiting all over the local priests, but I am still deeply disturbed every single time one of my kids uses the dark powers they have been mastering since kindergarten to pin me to the wall in the manner of a crucifix by hurling the kitchen knives at me with their minds.  But HEY! I am a public school mom!  The Devil’s horde just doesn’t bother me that much anymore.

So this Spring, when Lucifer sent a plague of head lice to torment my family, I went out and got some Nix and slathered it all over my house, my children, the cats, the furniture, etc., etc..  I bagged up everything that could be bagged up in big garbage bags and sealed them shut for two weeks.  I combed through everyone’s heads and tried as best as I could to comb through my own.  I washed and dried and washed and dried and washed and dried all the bed linens.  I bought some anti-lice aerosol spray and coated every item in my house that couldn’t be bagged or washed.  I went through this process at least twice before we left for Ree’s house as head lice, four boys and seven beds that everyone in our house likes to rotate through based on the phases of the moon, makes for insidious, stealth, ninja-like head lice and just when you think you have it conquered, they show up again. Neither the Country Doctor nor I showed any signs of head-lice, but we treated ourselves every time we treated out kids just to be safe.

We arrived at Ree’s late Friday night.  I was very nervous and in order to insure that everyone knew I was a total freakball, the first thing I did after I got through the front door was to loudly proclaim that my children had head lice.

HEY EVERYONE!  GUESS WHAT!  MY KIDS HAVE HEAD LICE!  MY HOUSE, MY KIDS, EVERYTHING HAS HEAD LICE!

Then I tore off my clothing, ran down to the cow pasture and set the prairie on fire.  As soon as the fire had burned down to an ember, I grabbed some sooty dirt, rubbed it all over my body, came back into the lodge and demanded some food!  ”Give me some grub!” I hollered, “And I don’t mean the maggoty stuff that I have been diggin’ out of my kid’s heads!”

Ree sat a plate of lasagna down in front of me and I dug into it with GUSTO!  Because I was officially a cowgirl now!  My entire backside was raw with half burned embers, my front side was coated in fresh cow dung and I didn’t know it yet, but my head was also crawling with little white maggots!  I ate with abandon, downed four brewskis as fast as four rifle shots, crawled down the hall to my bedroom, and slept like the dead.

The next morning we arose before the crack of dawn.  I hobbled out to the living room, tried every cowboy hat on in the house, went outside, wrangled me some cows, came back to the lodge and fried up a mess o’ bacon.

It wasn’t until late Saturday evening that my head began to itch.  At first I thought it was just ‘sympathetic itching’ or ‘paranoid itching’ or ‘phantom itching’ but the itching would not stop.  Since everyone knew about my kids having head lice, I was very self-conscious about itching my head.  I tried to be discreet.  As we sat around and talked, I pretended to be innocently twisting my hair in a charming backwoods, public-educated, demon-possessed way.  After twisting it for a while, I would surreptitiously let the twisting turn into a seven second itch-fest, then back to twisting, then itching, then twisting, then itching etc, etc.  When everyone started to look at me funny, I got up and grabbed the silverware basket from the dishwasher as if I were being a helpful guest, but before I placed each fork and knife in the utensil drawer, I furiously raked it through the part of my hair several times.  After I got all the silverware put away, my head was still itching like mad so I nonchalantly leaned against a bank of upper cabinets and began rubbing the crown of my head against the sharp corner edge until blood began to flow freely down my face.

“Does anyone want to play Cowboys and Indians?” I asked, blinking the dripping blood from my eyes.  I looked at Marlboro Man in particular, “C’mon Ladd!” I screamed, “You be the cowboy and I will be the Indian!”  I dipped my finger in some of my blood and used it as war paint on my cheeks.  Then I handed Ladd a huge butcher knife and knelt on the ground in front of him.  ”Scalp me Marlboro Man!” I begged.  ”Scalp me until you can see my brains!” I begged.  ”Please!  Oh Please, Please, Please! Just Rip It Off!  Go ahead!  Just slice off the top of my head!  HAVE SOME MERCY MARLBORO MAN!   Just do it!”

Ree asked me if I wanted a cup of coffee.

“Yes… please… Holy GodPlease…” I gasped as I tried to dab up my gushing blood from the pine floor with the hem of my shirt.

She handed me a steaming cup and I promptly poured it over my burning head and then began smashing the mug against the back of my skull, desperate for just a few seconds of relief from the non-stop itching. Then I picked up the broken shards from the busted mug and used them to scrape against what little remained of my torn, raggedy scalp.  This went on all night long, but I don’t think anyone really noticed me  How does one notice anyone else when Pioneer Woman and Marlboro Man are in the room?  It’s like being in the presence of Brad and Angelina… Katie and Tom… Jack and Jackie Kennedy.

When I got back home on Sunday, I re-treated myself and combed through my hair for an hour.  Evidence of an infestation was indisputable.  I knew the right thing to do was to contact Ree with this horrifying bit of news.  But how? How? How does one tell Jacqueline Kennedy that you just infested the white house with head lice?  But I did try to write an email to her…

Dear Ree,

I had head lice while I was at your house.  Sorry.

Dear Ree,

You are going to need to wash everything in the lodge with boiling water and tie plastic bags around all your guest’s heads for the next two weeks.

Dear Ree,

We really enjoyed ourselves at your house.  Thanks for having us.  Oh… by the way… I had head lice while I was there so you are going to have to disinfect everything I touched… which is everything in the lodge…

Dear Ree,

Wow!  What a great weekend!  I will never forget it!  And guess what!  You will never forget it either because I had head lice while I was there!  Hey!  It could be worse!  I could have had bed bugs!

Dear Ree,

Burn down the lodge and start over.  I gave you stealth ninja head lice and it won’t ever go away. Ever!  Never ever ever ever.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________

I am sorry to tell you this, but I never did write that letter.

I went with Plan B. instead.

I prayed.

I prayed and I prayed and I prayed.

I begged God to please not give Pioneer Woman head lice.

Please God!  Please Please Please Please God.  Please place a hedge of protection around Pioneer Woman and the Lodge and do not let the head lice establish dominion over the lodge or Pioneer Woman’s head. Heavenly Lord – If you grant me this one prayer,  I will never make fun of your chosen people, the homeschoolers again.  I will become a homeschooling advocate!  I will homeschool my own kids!  I will found a recovery center for homeschooled adults. I will start a new blog dedicated to homeschooling and all of it’s holy goodness and light.  Just please, please, please do not let Pioneer Woman get head lice.  And dear God, I will also stop using the word ‘ass’ on my blog.  And I will place a bible verse in the upper left hand corner above the page fold and just under the header… no wait… above the header!  ABOVE THE HEADER GOD!    Just please God PLEASE do not let Pioneer Woman get head lice from me.  Thank you God.  You are the best God ever.  Love ya, Rechelle.

I have no idea if Pioneer Woman got head lice or not. But I do know, that we eventually got rid of it around here, although it took longer than I would ever have thought possible.  In fact, it took so long, that I figured it was my penance for making fun of homeschoolers and I let myself off the hook with all the homeschooling advocate, recovery center, bible verse in the corner promises I made to God. My head feels a little itchy right now, but I am sure that is just ‘phantom memory itching’ from telling this sad story again.

Isn’t it?

Please?

Please God?

Please, Please, Please!

Comments

  • DirtyKSmama - Nikki:

    You had me at “Satan’s public schools.”

    Laughing so hard I’m snorting (and now also itching.)

  • This is hilarious…the thought of going to “Jackie O’s” ranch afflicted with the Lice!! Love it!

  • Laughing so hard, I’m crying…husband wonders if I’ve finally gone completely insane.

    I dread the big “L” with an obsessive worry and WEEKLY check the boys hairs for creeping maggots. Gross. I know its gonna happen one day. They’re boys and they’re in public school, on public transport and rubbing up against public stuff. Again, gross.

    BTW: Best post evah.

  • I am cracking up! I love this story! Everything you write is hilar – you are the apotheosis of a blog writer! And exactly what chapter & verse of the Bible contains: “Oh! He has a Double Re-Cracker!” ??

    And I think I’m hilarious b/c I was thinking that Ree should call the “Home & Garden” section, “Home, Horse & Hound!” Get it? Get it? She has HORSES! And a basset HOUND! And remember that scene from “Notting Hill” (the movie w/ Hugh Grant & Julia Roberts) when he says he is from “Horse & Hound”!?!?!?? GET IT?

    And I totally understand getting nervous & having to show everyone what a giant freakball I am – I do it all the time when I meet new people. Hmmm…..maybe that’s why I have a hard time making new friends…Revelation! (& not the book of the Bible by the same name)

  • Bobbie Thompson:

    its not a shame to keep them its just a shame to keep them.

  • Bobbie Thompson:

    its not a shame to get them sorry too early in the morning

  • Ugh. I have nightmares about head lice. Oh, and BTW — the movie was Babe (The Gallant Pig). I love that line.

  • I had to send this link to my daughter, because they’ve had the head-lice battle before.
    Funny stuff here to get my day started. Thanks for the smile.

  • Stephanie:

    Little Donkey quote from Shrek
    I don’t think I could have told PW either..
    Luckily my boys have never had it but my
    brothers family had it bad…my niece has
    beautiful thick black hair…they just could
    not get the nits out…so sad little 8 yr old
    got a buzz cut just like her little brother

  • Trudy:

    Now that I’ve stopped spewing coffee on my monitor, I have decided that I will never again be self conscious about traveling when mother nature gives me my monthly”gift”…..I could be bringing the plague of head lice instead…..which seems far more entertaining.

  • kathy:

    Rechelle,my daughter is 31 yrs old and I still remember the epic head lice battle when she was in 1st grade!After making a huge bonfire in the back yard of every object,in the house and dancing around it naked and chanting WE WILL NOT SUFFER A HEAD LICE TO LIVE!!…we then sang the theme song fro the BEVERLY HILLBILLIES just to make sure. we still itched for a few years after that. I finally stopped shaving everybody’s head two years later when we got sick of being mistaken for Krishna’s and being chased out of every mall in a fifty mile radius.In short dear CDW,I feel your pain! I’m starting to ITCH!!Going to find electric razor now.

  • Hilarious post, although you sound a little bitter toward PW and laden with actual guilt over sending your kids to public school. We do the best we can for our kids, enough judgment of other moms already.
    You are a good writer though.
    Suzy

  • Laurie:

    You are just insane!! Insanely hilarious!!

    I’ve got the phantom itch now, thank you very much…

  • Scherrue:

    Great post! The tears are streaming down my face. Am so glad to have those years behind me…but you never forget them. And the movie was Shrek!

  • OH MY…you win for most uncomfortable situation I’ve heard in a long time, both physically and mentally! I’m itching just thinking about it. {insert mad sympathy itching here} I think I’ll go get some coffee and try to forget…

  • I was tempted to NOT READ THIS as soon as I saw the DREADED WORD!! So I skimmed through it instead and was laughing towards the end. I started to itch my head

  • Great Halloween post! Very blood and gory!

  • Mary J:

    It’s the bus!! We were having this battle over and over and over and over talked with other moms in the nix section of our grocery store (all of us scratching) we compared notes all of our kids rode the same bus. We called the bus company the scoured the bus no more lice.

  • I have phantom itching now !!!!

  • Heather:

    Awsome post!!! you and your sister are so freaking funny!!!

  • kathleen:

    Laugh out loud funny. I was reading and thinking “what a nut” but in a good way! Thanks for the laugh.

  • Erin:

    That may have been the best story I’ve ever read….! :-)

  • Susan:

    Your imagination is boundless and your writing is hilarious! So funny – laughing out loud while at work.

  • Yes, I do believe you are envious, bitter etc about PW success.
    Methinks you protest too much.

  • suzetta:

    You are one disturbed individual. That’s what I love about you!

  • Kristina P:

    Shrek – the first one, most definitely the only really GOOD one

    Ok, now my head is itching! I would have shaved my head.

  • Kathy:

    Thanks for the phantom itching that I am now feeling. I laughed out loud and scared my cat, and I really needed that laugh.

  • siltedrepose:

    I had head lice my senior year in high school. I don’t know where they came from, and no one else in my family got them. I wouldn’t let Dad cut my hair, so my parents had to comb through fairly long stuff with those tiny combs. We had to go get prescription lice shampoo to do them in. It terrifies me when my head itches, too. And I did that self-conscious thing where I tried to be sneaky in scratching my head so no one would know.

  • First of all damn you! Now my head itches and I’m sure I have creepy crawlies in my head.

    Second of all I’m sure Ree didn’t get lice otherwise we would have read about it complete with pictures and a side or two of Charlie.

    Third and finally LISTERINE is your friend. When the first sign of head lice rears it’s ugly head rinse everything in LISTERINE even your hair. A cup in the laundry and then treat with Nix or Pix or whatever the heck that stuff is. Oh and SUNSHINE is your friend.

  • I think we would have heard about it if lice turned up at The Lodge. I wonder if any other guests complained about lice when they got home. Maybe I’ll go spy on their blogs to see! :)

    Happy Birthday! Or at least that’s what Jenni says. Maybe you want to go on like it never happened. I understand totally. Forget I said anything.

    :)

  • M.R.:

    It’s okay Rechelle — PW gave me a virus! On my work computer! And when I emailed her, she even admitted it. And I had to go to the helpdesk and confess that I was reading a blog at work. It took two days before I got my computer back. I only have dial up at home and her site is not dial up friendly since it has all those pages and all those pictures and …

    So I have not been able to read PW since then which is probably a good thing because she writes too much for me to be spending my time reading it at work.

  • JenC:

    Oh! He has a Double Re-Cracker!…Which Bible verse is this from?

  • This post is exactly why I read your blog.
    I guffawed. A real, honest to goodness guffaw.
    Very timely as well since Satan’s bugs are also infesting my son’s public school hellhole as well.
    I too would have waited and prayed.
    Not that I would ever be invited to the ranch, but if I was, and I had lice…I would have never admitted it either.
    Glad they’re gone now.

  • Tears of LAUGHTER!! You must have read her blog everyday, hoping the word lice never came up!

    How horrible, my head is starting to itch.

    I think I would have done the same.

  • notmuchofacook:

    Oh, dear, that was hilarious! Your account was so layered; home schooling, public schooling, Satan, fire, blood, lice, PW and MM…good writing. Thank you.

  • Cassie:

    From what I have been told if you dye your hair with peroxide, it will kill the lice better than Nix. I don’t know how true it is, but it might be worth the effort if it is really being a ninja. And who doesn’t love being a blonde?

  • birdgirl:

    If your story is true….well……you need an attitude adjustment.

  • Sandy in MI:

    Loved the post, but now I am SO ITCHY!

  • Great post!! LOVE the comparison to the Kennedys….

  • Now, MONTHS after the fact, 75,000+ people are scratching their heads, with forks.
    Lawd….the Drama. Was it the Southern Living Crew that visited the ranch after you guys? Or who? Whoever it was prob. just blamed the lice on their public schooled kids.

  • I think you forgot to disinfect your blog because I’m sure we’re all catching head lice from here now! Eee-gads … has PW read this yet?

  • Christy:

    I am SURE it is because you made fun of those creepy home school people. They would never get anything normal like head lice. God favors them, didn’t you know?

    The more I think about it, I think you might of went to Ree’s house or her other house on purpose, with hope filled in your heart, that her family would get head lice. Didn’t you?

    I’m sure you only did it for educational purposes, though, so I still love ya. How else are you ever going to teach those home schooled kids about head lice? Ree should thank you. She makes home schooling look too easy so she deserved it.

  • JB:

    I think some people just don’t get you. I’m not sure how they went from lice to your jealous of PW. I too wonder if PW has read this yet. I gather from her blog that she’s got a funny sense of humor and will laugh too. Really people if you don’t like the blog GO away!

    J from Lawrence

  • Wendy:

    How funny you are….But…my head is totally itching…ugh! I also went through a bout of lice about 18 years ago with my daycare children..Oh my..what a horrible thing to have to de-louse EVERYTHING in the house and us too..

  • Nancy in AK:

    you are very funny! I wonder if PW reads your blog. I bet she does but she is very busy with her book tour right now so you may luck out. I was thinking the very same thing about the missing garden, but I do love PW. We all love PW. I love your blog, too!

  • Betsy:

    I can’t believe you didn’t tell her! WOW :)

  • tonya:

    I love PW and actually found Rechelle’s old blog CDW through a mention on PW. :)
    I’ve also seen Ree blog about her garden….this year she was talking about how late it went in. I also saw pictures. So it’s there, just not nearly as much of garden as home. :)

  • Laughing at the post and laughing at everyone’s comments as well.

  • Linda:

    Oh, I hope PW doesn’t read your blog!! It was very funny though!

  • Did you read about the missing sheets at the Lodge? Is that why you took those sheets with you?

  • Okay, where is that afore-mentioned “public-schooling” section of your blog? I would love to see it. I’m sure that the schools have excellent thematic projects that can turn episodes with head lice into “teachable moments”. Lice infestations throughout history, perhaps? The reproductive cycles of head vermin? Higher math and head lice? The possibilities seem endless…

  • I am having flashbacks to two summers ago and the case of lice from HE!!

    Itch, itch, scratch, scratch, scratch. My best friend wouldn’t bring her kids to my house for two months. Her daughter got it this summer.

  • Shrek.

  • You have truly gone off the deep end, Rechelle. Truly.

  • Carole:

    I remember my now 20 yo son sitting on my bed having a heart to heart visit with me and then telling me his head really itched. Yup, I got head lice too. Only we call them head lights

  • Debra:

    oh, you are hilarious!

  • Rechelle,
    Just one question. What on God’s green earth have you been drinking??????????????

  • This is the funniest thing I’ve read in quite some time! I’m just imagining lice crawling all over that beautiful lodge, lying in wait for the next unsuspecting visitor to the famous PW.

  • Too too funny!
    Love your blog and your sense of humor.
    Head lice really aren’t the kiss of death…it just seems that way!

  • A concerned reader:

    I know this was meant to be funny, but you need to learn the art of being funny without disparaging other people. You were a houseguest of PW and you put her down on your blog under the guise of humor. If I had a houseguest that I fed, attended to, and well, put up with, only to have them belittle me afterwards AND leave lice behind AND not have the common decency to tell me about the lice, well I would be furious. Your negativity toward PW says more about you than her. I think it’s time to look inward, Rechelle, for yourself and your boys. I sense vindictiveness so I will not leave my real name nor my real email address.

  • Yikes “concerned”, where is she belittling her???? .

    I think you are being nitpicky here…You are only scratching the surface……I’m scratching my head here trying to figure you out…
    the comments that infest this blog……

  • I have to admit, as I was reading this and laughing, I started to have the same thoughts that “Concerned” voiced. I read this blog almost every day and I always enjoy it but this actually made me uncomfortable.

  • Terry:

    This made me uncomfortable on many levels too. I think you owed it to PW and the others to fess up. This also made me wonder about the “missing sheets”.

  • anon:

    WOW!! You were the one that stole the sheets too! You will totally never get an invite back again!

  • Axelle the french reader:

    I don’t think you stole the sheets ;-)…
    I love your blog and the way you see things, your way of teeling stories, this little “bitter perfume”, sometimes. Because we don’t live in a perfect world, and we’re not perfect.
    But I have to say that I was very surprised by this post, too.
    It must be because I’m one more PW’s fan.
    But I have supposed it was humour.

  • CilleyGirl:

    Wow, I didn’t know that not only are there posts about lice on your blog but the lice also actually leave their own comments!

  • kathy:

    I showed my husband this blog and he thought it was rude to Ree and MM. I told him it was a joke but he didn/t think so. It is just a joke right?I actually wouldn’t have laughed if I thought it was real.Just call me confused.

  • Martha in Kansas:

    Oh, my! The story of the Dreadful Lice was funny. But the audience reaction tops it! There’s so much more elbow room here in the Reading Room now that the PW fans have huffed out (and the Kennedy fans too!). The story will be complete if PW leaves an offended comment. (Didn’t she introduce you on her blog as having a crazy sense of humor? Clearly she gets it.) So now I’m looking forward to your next flight of fancy and how you’ll blend your real life with the crazy version we all (or maybe just some of us) have in our heads. Love ya. In a blog-like way, of course.

  • Alicia:

    LOVE your sarcasm, it’s so…..so…….SUBTLE! I think some of your readers are missing the essence of you humor…the post would not have been so hilarious without the edge and rawness of your humor. As a nurse and mother of 4, I DO think you should have told her, since you knew for certain you had it while in their home—- HOWEVER, I also believe in the power of prayer!

  • Dear Rechelle,
    Can you write a piece on Palin next?
    I’ll pop the popcorn.

  • Lillian:

    Rechelle, I’m not commenting on whether you really didn’t tell Ree about the lice or not because I don’t know which parts you made up and which parts are true. However, the tone of your blog has really changed over the past several months. There’s this undercurrent of anger and/or bitterness that I’m finding difficult to read. I’ve been subscribed to your blog for a long time and while your comments about Ree may not be meant in a negative tone, they do come across as disparaging. Again, this may not be your intent, but that’s how it sounds – at least to me. I’m no Pioneer Woman worshipper so whatever you want to write is no skin off my nose (or scalp) but I’m sure I’m going to be lumped into the humorless category so many of your readers have been quick to throw those of us not praising your humor into and that’s fine. As you well know, it’s your blog. Write what you want – I’m just not up to reading it anymore.

  • Woah! I know…but don’t feel too bad. Everyone looks sooo down on having lice, its scary. You can be very tempted to keep it on the “DOWN LOW” and hush hush…happens all the time.

    Making my head super itchy now. Yuck.

    Scott

  • confused:

    I have to agree that the tone of this blog has changed drastically since your trip abroad.

  • Not only is this story hilarious, the comments are just as funny. Thank you Rechelle for providing entertainment so early in the morning!

    Teri
    who did not spew coffee on the keyboard & monitor…got cats for that

  • Kaye:

    Well, this is why lice is rampant–because people cannot be *real* and admit that they have it.

    It’s too bad that such a stigma is attached to headlice, but before you went into another person’s home, you should have alerted them that your family was going through headlice. I don’t think it matters if you knew that you had it at the time or not–your family had it, you were battling it, and you had high chances of having it, too. The RIGHT thing to do would have been to let Ree know before going to her home, and to volunteer NOT to go this time. If she wasn’t too concerned about it, she could have insisted on your attendance–it would have been her decision from there.

    How is it funny to knowingly expose another family (and anyone who slept in the bed after you!) to the expense–it can take hundreds of dollars to rid a family of lice!–and months-long battle of headlice?!

  • Oh my gosh, I think you are insane! This is my very first visit to your blog, I have only read this post. I laughed so hard I cried. It’s early and I am trying not to wake my kids up, so I almost died trying to muffle my hysterical cackling! The visual of you screeching at Marlboro Man to scalp you may just never leave my brain. I will definitely be back!