I awoke at the crack of dawn yesterday (which is 8:00 am in my world) and after staring at my garden for a while (which is my new favorite hobby) I made a pot of coffee and set about the task of finding a place for my family to stay during our upcoming three day visit to Paris. ”How hard can this be?” I thought, “All I need is a small, charming hotel with a fabulous bakery and picturesque flower stall just next door… that has a room large enough for all six of us… within minutes of all the major sights… for less than eighty dollars a night. Surely Paris has literally millions of hotels like that!”
Hwahhhhhh Hawarrrhhhhhh Hwahhrrhrhhrhhr Awahwhhwhwhahahwhehwhh. Hooo Heee Ha ha ha ha ha ha HO!
Twelve hours later, I had eliminated the flower stall, the bakery, the charm, the central location, the tidiness and I had certainly eliminated the eighty dollar room price.
Instead I was looking at spending more like $500.oo a night for two tiny rooms where the six of us would have to share four twin beds, in a far flung arrondissement (or burrough) that is a twenty minute subway ride to the next subway which will finally get you to the Eiffel Tower.
I gave up on finding an affordable hotel and switched to looking at ‘family hostels’. I found several on Trip Advisor that have incredible prices starting at around $60.00 a night! Thank God I thought! My family will be able to sight-see AND still eat! Then I started reading the reviews of the hostels and I saw far too many comments that said things like…
Bed Bugs…
Smelly mattress…
I watched the janitor snap on a pair of gloves, clean the toilet and then move over to the beds without changing his gloves.
There were some positive reviews too, but my mind pretty much shut down after ‘bed bugs’ and ‘smelly mattress’.
So I moved over to the idea of renting an apartment for three days…
I had a lot more luck with apartments. I found several that were in a good locations (the 5th and the 6th arrondissement as Marilyn so wisely instructed me), could sleep six, and were slightly cheaper than two tiny hotel rooms that could only sleep four. We would be able to make a few of our own meals in the tiny apartment kitchen, and live like real Parisians for a few days! I sent thousands of emails to the various apartment owners telling them that we were a party of six which included two adults and four of the most well-behaved boys ages seven to fourteen that you have ever laid eyes on. My boys would never even think about turning a tiny living room into an indoor soccer field and in fact, my boys spend most of their time sitting quietly, praying, and doing crossword puzzles.
This morning I eagerly checked my e-mail as all of these apartment owners promise to reply within 24 hours. So far, I have heard from NONE of them.
Do you think it has something to do with the whole ‘four boys’ thing?
Should I have lied and said I had ‘four daughters’ instead?
Finally, I did what I should have done in the first place. I consulted my Fodor’s guide to Paris. Fodor’s mentioned one hotel that was centrally located, a bit Bohemian, but a great value. I don’t mind Bohemian! I love Bohemian! I am Bohemian! I checked out their web site. I could get two ‘triples’ which means a room that sleeps three, for about a hundred dollars less a night than any other hotel I had found. Around midnight, I sent off a very polite e-mail to this ‘Bohemiaan hotel’
Bonjour! We are looking for rooms for two adults and four children ages 7, 11, 12, and 14.
Your hotel looks lovely and I hope you have room for us!
This morning there was a hot and fresh email in my inbox that still smelled of Bohemian baguettes and Bohemian cafe au lait.
Dear Madam, Sir,
It is with great care that we have read your request. Please find
herewith the information about our establishment. Our
charming Hotel located in the Latin Quarter, in the very heart of Old
Paris , within walking distance of all the major monuments of Paris
like: Notre-Dame Cathedral, Louvre Museum, The Oldest Zoological and
Botanical Gardens of the World and the Luxembourg Gardens…
The email went on to give a description of each room including the view from each balcony. It is still outrageously expensive and I am sure our rooms will be microscopic, but it is in a great location and the actually replied to my email without flinching about the whole four boys thing. I didn’t flinch either.
I booked it.
Now to find a charming, spacious, centrally located, vine covered English cottage, with a luminous garden, free scones and all the tea I can drink, from which to do all of our English countryside exploring…
for less that fifty bucks a night of course.
That shouldn’t be too hard.
Should it?
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