A Conversation With the Oracle

October 26th, 2008

The Country Doctor’s family is in the midst of planning an 80th birthday bash for the Country Doctor’s dad – Joe. This event is being hosted at our home and e-mails have been flying through cyber space to firm up the details. I have been in close contact with the Oracle Known as Steve during this time. Here are a few of our exchanges. One of the Country Doctor’s sister’s has also been thrown in for a little variety. 
I started out with a simple, clear, CONCISE statement as to what the CD and I would plan on contributing to the party…

Dear all:

The Country Doctor and I can do the bread and butter and any condiments. We will also take care of beverages (tea, water, soda) and paper products. We have five bedrooms available (which includes the dismal basement bedroom). Plenty of room on various floors as well.


Dear Rechelle:

 I talked to the girls and they would like to reserve the guest room on the first floor to lay our pretty little heads on Saturday evening. We prefer the cotton sheets to flannel and if we could get a little fresh lavender on our pillows we’ll mention you when we say our prayers at night. 

Thanks Dear. 
Uncle Steve

Dear Steve,

You’re not my uncle.
You also may not pick your room. 

They will be assigned in order of arrival. 
Please take your time in getting here.

Dear Rechelle,

We hope to stay overnight too if possible so would like to reserve a room. Anywhere is fine.


Dear Christi,

Yes Christi, you can have the room Steve wanted.


Dear Rechelle,

Several people have hinted that I should be in charge of the party. Rechelle… I’m sorry I’m a little too busy this time but I will consult.

Dear Steve,

So glad you are available to consult. I have no idea how I could handle this shindig without you.

Dear Rechelle:

You are so very very much welcome. It is always a pleasure to share the benefits and wisdom of my many many social endeavors with those who are just beginning their first tentative forays into these gentle arts. I have so many fabulous recommendations, let’s get together soon, to share ideas, and then I can work up a little plan for you to use.

Thanks again for your prompt response. If nothing else we have that.

My warmest regards

P.S. I have attached a recipe for country gravy which I am sure you will find to be ambrosia compared to what usually gets served. I would suggest a big batch as it will go quick quick dear…

P.P.S. Jason has agreed to join us for our kibitz. His ideas on finger sandwiches are simply divine. 

Dear Steve:
I do not have enough room in the entire house plus the surrounding eight acres for your gravy.  If you will remember last time you made gravy at my  house, the basement flooded, the toilets backed up and the pond overflowed.  Please leave your gravy making skills at home.  

Dear Rechelle:

In reviewing your earlier, brief but lovely, note, I noticed that when listing the proposed beverages (tea, water, soda) you unfortunately failed to list some very desirable potables. I am sure that your  limited list is meant to represent the basics and not the full extent of the offerings. As I am sure this is the case, perhaps the addition of some punctuation such as this (tea, water, soda…) would be better. This would help to insure that nobody could possibly misconstrue your missive. After all we wouldn’t want people to think that there won’t be any say lemonade or milk or BEER. I’ve got a little mantra that I embraced years ago. Everything is better with the three B’s… Butter, Bacon and BEER.

I’m so glad we caught this oversight now. While it is still correctable.

A pleasure, I’m sure.


P.S. Sometimes when I’m feeling especially silly I will add Brisket
and Beans for a total of five B’s but let’s not get that silly yet.
Ta ta,
The Oracle

Uh Steve… 

I am not of the understanding.

You go wacky wacky and I go honny honny lo lo.

What is this beer of which you speak?

I would like to discuss the decor instead. Who is in charge of the

and the SWAGS!!!
That’s all for now…  Here at CDW we will keep you updated on any more breaking communications from the Oracle Known as Steve as they come flying in.  
On Pins and Needles,