The Vanity of Boys

March 3rd, 2008

I have boys. Four boys. In their current bathroom, they have four drawers. Two of them are completely empty. They do not need curling irons, barettes, ribbons, clippies, head bands, lip gloss, eye shadow, hairspray, self tanning lotion, mirrors, moisturizer, loofahs, nail polish, jewelry, or hot wax. Their morning routine requires only a comb and a toothbrush. Thus the empty drawers.

I grew up in a house of women. Our bathroom was very different. Between my sister and I we probably had twelve different kinds of avon perfume in collector ceramic figurines. The bride was my favorite. We also had a vast collection of Mary Kay cosmetics in pink plastic cases. Our bright yellow vanity was littered with hot rollers, a regular curling iron, a brush curling iron, a blow dryer, combs, brushes, and a pink plastic pick.

We fought a lot in that bathroom. I learned later that the color yellow can stimulate aggression, so I blame the bright yellow vanity on which our hot curling irons rested. We often picked them up and used them as battering rams agains each other. My boys fight in the bathroom too, but thankfully all they’ve got are toothbrushes, and hot water.

This is the cabinetry color and the possible choices for the boys vanity top where no hot curling irons will ever be used as branding irons during their lucky little childhoods.

Feel free to vote – I don’t know how many more of these type of decision I can make before I short circuit and throw myself on the mercy of my mom and sister who will gladly come in and decorate my entire house for me. With little to no regard for my opinions.